January 13, 2011

The Top 5 Gayest Cartoon Characters

Very few cartoons these days are appropriate for children. There is a time limit on cartoon network until kids can watch, then adult swim comes on for kids older than 13. Every cartoon channel changes to adult shows after a certain time now. After this time is when all the gay cartoon characters come out to "play". Here are the top five gayest cartoon characters.

1. Smithers

Who is the character?
Smithers is Springfield Nuclear Power Plant's owner Mr. Burn's assistant in the Simpsons. He has been Mr. Burn's assistant he first appeared in the episode "Homer's Oddyssey". Smithers represents a closeted gay man in which the show refers to him as a "Burns-sexual". Smithers is not openly gay but he goes on frequent trips to a male-only resort. Smithers occasionally has fantasies of Mr. Burn: when his computer turns on, it shows a nude Burns who says "Hello Smithers, your quite good at turning me on.

What is up with him and his fantasies! If that is not gay then I don't know what is. If the cake one didn't creep you out then Mr. Burns flying through the window had to do it. Its not even funny, its purely outright gay! I would hate to be Mr. Burns!!!

2. Stewie

Who is the character:
Stewie is the baby from Family Guy who is always trying to kill his mother or take over the world. Yet, Stewie also has another personality in him, the part of him that is gay. He is always trying to get attention from his dog in sexual ways. His thoughts sometimes are gay too.
When Stewie acts gay, it is funny. Because the way he tries to get the attention of others is really halarious. His role as a baby on top of that makes everyone laugh. When he is riding his dog as a horse in his gay costume makes me want to slap him for being gay.

3. Peppermint Patty

Who is the character:
Peppermint Patty is the queen bee of gay cartoon characters. As a child I always wondered if she was a boy or a girl. No one ever knew because she always dressed like a boy to be a tom girl. She is in the cartoon Charlie Brown. She is a transsexual who hits on Charlie Brown occasionally. She just needs to pick one sex and stick with it. Gayest Cartoon Characters TV Characters

4. Big Gay Al

Who is the character:
Big Gay Al runs "Big Gay Al's Sanctuary" in South Park and teaches us all that being gay is great! He was a Boy Scout leader before he got fired for his sexual orientation. After Colorado legalized gay marriage in "Follow That Egg", he tied the knot.with Mr. Slave. The two have ever since been trying to change the definition of "faggot". The two are just annoying Harley Motorcycle riders though. South Park never should have had this character on from the beginning.
Big Gay Al

5. Mr. Garrison

Who is the character:
Mr. Garrison is a staff teacher at South Park Elementary School in the animated television show South Park. Yet, Mr. Garrison was in denial of his homosexuality to the point of homophobia, and was always seen with his hand puppets that he claimed were gay. He eventually comes out of the closet and returns to teaching after he went missing, hiding in the mountain, living in isolation. Mr. Garrison also is a transsexual in some of the episodes.

Mr. Garrison is not funny at all and is purely gay. He finally figured out that he was gay, after the students knew. At least he is not in denial and figured out what he is. But after he finds out he was gay he tries to get back with his boyfriend (in the above picture) but he already found someone else. I am happy that happens to him. He deserves to be lonely forever for pissing off people off by taking forever to figure one thing out about himself!


  1. Parts of this article seem a bit offensive. What about Stewie being gay makes you want to slap him? And why should Patty "pick one sex and stick with it"?

  2. I also don't feel like you understand what transexual means...

  3. This is atrocious in so many fucking ways.

  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

  5. WOW.

    You come off as douche in this post.

    That's really all I have to say.

    Way to douche, sir douche.